First he came for Star Trek, and I didn’t speak out because I wasn’t a Trekkie. Then he came for Star Wars, and I didn’t speak out because I wasn’t a fanboy. Then he came for Half-Life, and there was no one left to speak for me. But that’s probably just because Gordon Freeman is a silent protagonist.

Okay, okay, so Famous Television Guy J. J. Abrams getting his grubby mitts on, basically, everything isn’t exactly on the same scale as the Nazi party’s rise to power. And, quite honestly, I don’t seriously think much will come of him and Valve’s Gabe Newell saying “we wanna do stuff together.” Hell, I’ll be a bit surprised if he really does end up at the helm of Star Wars. Still. Doesn’t mean I hafta like that we’re talking about it.

Not that I have anything against the man personally. I mean, I don’t like Lost, and the new ’09 Trek film was entertaining enough, but nothing for the history books. My real beef? Well, think about it. The idea of a single dude being behind two of the biggest works of popular science fiction the world has known? And that he might further get his mitts on the works of Valve, one of gaming’s most influential development houses? That the dude behind fucking Lost could position himself as some sort of nerd Omnissiah, holding the reigns of popular culture, uncontested and uninspired, guiding what nerds are and shall be?

I think Kanye said it best: no one man should have all that powah.

…And anyway, what the hell does “J. J.” stand for? Huh? What’s he hiding?!