So why’d they even bother taking a captive? Look, all they know is that they’re supposed to have one. What they should¬†do¬†with one is something that hadn’t really come up before. Hell, they only lucked into this one because she was sitting in the other ship’s hold, pre-packaged and insisting.

Unfortunately for the romantically misaligned lass, all that awaited her on the terrible pirates’ ship was a fate worse than bawdy ravishment.

On the bright side, they can finally break out that sweet-ass mahjong set they looted.